Black domme stories

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Black domme stories

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He went to work wearing them that same day and frequently texted me his thanks. Seeing him in the bikinis did nothing for me sexually, but making him wear them did give me a rush.

I wasn't turned on by the thought of him in my underwear, but by the power play itself. I wondered what else I could get away with making him do.

I asked him why he reached out to me, what made him think it was OK to offer himself as a sub to me.

He said he thought I looked lovely and was just taking a chance. Further prodding revealed he had explored some sub behavior with another older black woman.

He liked the maturity of black women and how we don't put up with a lot of bullshit. He said white women his age were vapid and frequently dismissed him because of his youthful appearance.

Because of his age and appearance, I didn't feel threatened by his ignorance, even though his desire for a Strong Black Woman to take control of him sexually was an echo of other messages I'd received via OkCupid.

I also overlooked it this time because I wanted to test the limits of my sexuality. As my relationship with Baby Sub progressed, I was surprised at how easily some domme behavior came to me.

Small things like forbidding him from interrupting me while I talked were thrilling. I made sure never to punish in anger, but being able to express my anger and his fear of it were exciting — and I didn't have to worry about him passive-aggressively punishing me for my anger by hanging out all night with his friends or by flirting with other women, or even cheating.

I could be aggressive, but it was usually with the purpose of getting the guy I was with to ramp up his own aggression.

But there were limits. Whenever I had expressed a desire to do something basic like tie up my partner or blindfold him, I was met with resistance, which led to discussions about masculinity, not to mention straight-up fear: The thought that I might do "butt stuff" to my boyfriends while they were tied up was too much for them to bear.

It was frustrating that I was expected to be the only one willing to experiment sexually and that my then-boyfriends couldn't trust me enough to respect their boundaries.

Still, when I told my male friends about what was happening in my sex life, they weren't surprised. In fact, one friend was shocked it had taken me so long to get to that point.

My love of men on their knees is no secret among my friends. And neither is my sexual appetite.

My love for receiving head and wanting sex as much as I can get it are favorite subjects of mine. Add being a feminist and my love for Wonder Woman, a character somewhat created from kink , into the mix, and I guess my guy friends figured I would've donned the latex and leather a while ago.

But even with Baby Sub, I never wore the expected leather and latex uniform of a dominatrix. Instead, I shaped my previous experience as an educator for my domme persona.

I made Baby Sub grow his hair out so I could have something to pull. I put him on masturbation restriction. He wasn't allowed to touch himself unless I gave him permission.

When he had too many typos in his texts, I made him call me and repeat an apology, which included calling himself too horny to type properly, until I told him to stop.

He had a journal where he had to answer questions I posed. Sometimes I made him watch porn, knowing he wouldn't be able to give himself any relief.

I did not allow any race play, but I would penalize him when he'd say something ignorant about his experiences with black people, like when he'd disparage the significance of the band within HBCU Historically Black Colleges and Universities culture, belittling what he saw as a lack of musicality.

After a while it was clear he was bringing up racially sensitive subjects to bait me into punishing him, but I stopped that by forbidding him from talking about race.

He was a bratty sub who frequently tried to exert control by doing things he knew would require punishment or trying to manipulate me to get out of punishments, something called "topping from the bottom.

It was annoying and magnified how young he was. And I preferred rewarding him with praise and permission to touch me rather than punishing him, mainly because humiliating him with verbal abuse didn't arouse me.

He wanted to be spanked and insulted so he would push until I had no choice but to retaliate. To stop his bratty behavior, I put him on time out: I refused any contact with him.

He couldn't see me. No phone calls. No texts. He wasn't allowed to service me. He hated this type of punishment because it left him without order, without purpose.

Despite all of this, I still felt like I had no idea what I was doing — but I was learning. I watched more videos online, joined FetLife an online community dedicated to sexual fetishes , found a mentor through Twitter, and asked questions.

Through FetLife, I learned that the local men who were masters or dominants were almost all white and the language in their profiles frequently set off my internal racist alarms.

I saw one man with a picture of a Confederate flag belt buckle he used for flogging. The most popular local club, or "professional dungeon," lists in its code of conduct that "respect should always be accorded to every individual…" but when I'd see the expected attendees for gatherings, I'd cringe at how few people of color seemed to be present.

There were some black men who were doms, but based on their profiles, they were masters of primarily white women. If I'd reached out to them, I think I would've been ignored or rejected.

I didn't feel like I'd be safe or respected if I tried to attend one of the gatherings — not as someone new to the life and definitely not as a black woman.

I tried to find local black women dommes, but the majority of the black women I found were subs and slaves, who subjected themselves to race play — being called nigger, or acting as maids or breeders.

The few dommes I did see were fairly hardcore, their profiles filled with images of them in latex and stacked heels, whips gleaming in their hands.

I was too intimidated to approach them for mentorship. And I knew that wasn't the kind of domme I wanted to be. So I lived online, researching how to handle male subs.

I asked my male friends to tell me ways they'd like to be punished, if they would allow themselves the freedom of being submissive.

Because that's one of the many things I'd discovered as my relationship with Baby Sub continued: All he had to do was wait for me to give him instructions, wait to serve.

There's something very freeing about that. Meanwhile I had to put him on a schedule — when to wake up, when to contact me, when to go to bed.

I had to tell him what to wear, distribute punishments and rewards, figure out ways he could be of service. Imagine being a teacher and creating lesson plans then grading all day, every day, without break.

In the real world, maybe your goal is to move up in the nonprofit, and in the dungeon my goal is to have complete ownership and power over the CEO.

They're kind of different circumstances, but I think coming from the same place of this eternal desire to combat different oppressions.

I think it's almost cartoonish, the kind of experiences I have as a domme, in terms of what that power dynamic looks like.

It's a very exaggerated power dynamic, but its roots I think for me, emotionally, are coming from a need of being tired of navigating oppression, and wanting to feel some sort of power that's in my hands, even if it's just for one hour.

Yeah, I also don't want to romanticize it — it's also a lot of work and you get a lot really shitty things said to you.

Especially when I wasn't working in the dungeon, there were issues of safety. Sometimes I have to take breaks, like a month or two, and I really need my domme friends when I have a really weird or exhausting session.

People don't really know what you're experiencing, but you can talk to your other domme friends about it. Even if they're [white] — like one of my really good domme friends is a white femme and she's really fat, so when I'm talking about colorism, she's asking me things about that and talking about fatness.

I had a situation last week where someone wanted to do duos and I wanted to do it with her, and I showed him the picture of her and he was like, "I don't want to do it with her" with this underlying understanding that he was fatphobic.

I was able to support her and be like, "I'm sorry that happened and you're beautiful. How do you go about maintaining a safe space within this role and your dungeon?

I do intense screenings, and there's also a lot of good resources for sex workers. If someone's weird, or maybe has harassed someone in a session, there's certain groups and forms where you can write about that person so other sex workers will know not to engage with them.

Or when people fill out my forms, I ask for references so that I can reach out to that domme. There's a long, tedious process.

In terms of the dungeon, the one that I work at is owned by this really wonderful woman with a background in women and gender studies.

She's created these really beautiful spaces and there's always someone there. She and her assistant are there for my safety, as well as the safety of the client.

We also had to get trained in what it's like to be in that space. We need to know what's legal and what's not legal, so that we're making sure we're doing what's legal in the space.

There's lots of things that go into being a dom. It really is a business; it's more than just whipping someone. Why do you think that being a domme and BDSM in general continues to get a bad rep?

I think there's a lot shade and stigma around BDSM. Our society is so hella vanilla, and monogamous, and straight, and white, so anything that is outside of that is seen as bad.

I think that there's also weird things in media about BDSM, like tropes and stereotypes, that don't contribute to a more comprehensive understanding.

Because there's lots of shame, there's lots of other risks. Sex workers in general, and particularly with BDSM, don't get a voice to talk about their experiences.

Even when we do, I find myself in situations where people are interested in only certain aspects of my experiences.

Even my voice is cultivated to fit mainstream needs or the needs of audiences. It's not always a well-rounded or comprehensive platform to talk.

There's shame and risks associated, so we have to be discreet. Something that was really sad to me when I first moved to Chicago, and first really started posting ads and being more visible, was that I was like the only Black domme.

Which is why after a while I felt comfortable taking the title, and calling myself Chicago's premiere African dominatrix.

There's lots of doms that are Black, but in order to get visibility you have to have an income to also sustain a website. There has to be an investment in order to make a profit.

That's something that's unacceptable to most people. In terms of some of the more popular dommes, it's pretty white cause it's white people that generally have more access to the money, funds, capacity, and time to invest in really putting themselves out there and doing that marketing.

But then that's an avenue that's been cut off, so there goes a lot of representation of Black people. I think, if we're speaking outside of domming, just sex work in general, I would say a lot of Black sex workers, and Black trans sex workers, are maybe doing more street-based work.

For whatever reason our society glorifies strippers, but is still super weird about BDSM. I also think in terms of what is threatening to hegemony.

A man going to strip club with women, probably most likely cis women, doesn't necessarily challenge or veer away from patriarchal norms of gender expectations.

That doesn't seem that threatening to talk about; a dad could feel completely fine with going to a strip club, and it could not even be seen as anything out of the ordinary.

I think within BDSM, not even intentionally, but by virtue, it challenges the norms sometimes, I think that's why they get pushed to the radar.

I think it threatens hegemony. How do you go about informing people in your life that this is something that you do? I'm a Scorpio, so I'm pretty aggressive with things that I believe to be true or important.

I have the privilege of never really experiencing any shame around this. Even before I was able to really conceptualize it, it was really exciting.

The experiences are hilarious, and make for good stories. Certainly with the conceptualization, it allows me to validate more in this abstract way why this is important.

I don't also know if that's always necessary. I am being informed by things that I've learned, and talked about in academia, and I don't want to value that as the only way to justify yourself.

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Inside Look at a Dominatrix's House (by UCKYA)

Black Domme Stories Video

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I hadn't ever thought about these power dynamics. I had a pretty vanilla understanding of things until that point. It took a lot of trial and error.

I had a partner that I would practice things on. If I got a new toy like a new paddle or the violet wand, I was like.

We're all really good, and a lot of clients are always very like welcoming too, if there's something that I haven't tried before, them being someone I could practice on.

My Master's is interdisciplinary. I did gender studies and African studies. My undergraduate is also in women's studies, so I was already on a trajectory of being pretty big into feminism, and became much more leftist, and anti-capitalist.

I took a lot of really awesome classes around queer theory, and critical sexuality. Several of the books that I use when I have people read them are actually books that I read in school.

In terms of trajectory, domming hasn't replaced where I thought I would be. I knew I wanted to get my Master's to be in a nonprofit, and work in that way professionally.

I'm doing those things, it just also coincided in grad school with talking more about Black women's sexuality, and the challenges that Black women face in being sexual.

I was reading about those things alongside growing as a domme because I had a lot of curiosity. And as I did more school, I started to see that there are a lot more parallels in all aspects of my life.

I was like, "Oh, there are interesting themes going on with the things that I'm doing. Now it kind of propagated, but it coexists alongside my vanilla professional life, as well.

It's certainly fluid within it, but I'm not in a nonprofit that's focused on things around sex work. I do a lot of contract workshops and stuff in the city, not as Mistress Velvet, and then I talk about sex work.

It took me forever. I always tell people the hardest part of my Master's thesis was coming up with a title. I'm really not good at coming up with names for things.

I don't know how long it took me between the time where I was like, "OK, I'm gonna need to make a persona, to use a name," and the time that I actually came up with a name.

But I remember the day — I was on my couch reading heavy theory, and kind of bored, and I had gotten some really fancy lotions.

I was rubbing my legs in the lotion while reading, and I was like, "Oh, my skin's kind of like velvet, or like chocolate. I was like, "My skin's velvet, let's go with that.

It's definitely sometimes unreal. I think about [how] my professional life in the nonprofit is going really well, but there's also circumstances of being in very white spaces.

For example, even if I'm at my job, everyone's a woman, but when I first started working there I was the only person of color.

I'm just constantly thinking about race, and constantly thinking about being a woman, or being femme, and my place in these sort of contexts.

I certainly have to think about race, [which is] in some ways very heightened, in sessions, but also I don't have to think about it because I getting to really just exert power, in this almost kind of fantastical [way] — like it's a fantasy for both of us, you know.

In the real world, maybe your goal is to move up in the nonprofit, and in the dungeon my goal is to have complete ownership and power over the CEO.

They're kind of different circumstances, but I think coming from the same place of this eternal desire to combat different oppressions. I think it's almost cartoonish, the kind of experiences I have as a domme, in terms of what that power dynamic looks like.

It's a very exaggerated power dynamic, but its roots I think for me, emotionally, are coming from a need of being tired of navigating oppression, and wanting to feel some sort of power that's in my hands, even if it's just for one hour.

Our methods have worked on every man who has ever come here. Our methods have never yet failed to make a man into a slave! Our approach might seem cruel, but we have tried other methods, and find ours is the most efficient.

The use of an individual chain for each prisoner prevents escape, eliminates the need for constant supervision, and allows our slaves to work at their individual work places without any possibility of escape.

You must obey orders from any free person without hesitation or comment. When you are in the presence of a free person, you must kneel and keep your eyes down.

That is all you need to know for now. You can learn our other rules as you go along. Once you have heard a rule, be aware that you will be severely punished if you disobey!

All our slaves are strapped, every Sunday afternoon. Only 20 strokes, not too many. These weekly strappings provide a regular reminder of your status here, and a reminder of the penalty for not being a good slave.

If you are a good slave, you will probably not get any more additional strokes. You will just get your usual 20 every week.

But if you choose to be a bad slave, you will find that each of your errors will be noted by a black mark in the Punishment book, and you will receive fifty additional strokes for each black mark.

After you have felt the strap, you will be completely obedient, I assure you! And if not, we will be happy to repeat the lesson! I was quite scared by this tirade.

It sounded exactly like one of the mad fantasies I had written. Was this woman insane? Nothing like this could really exist. And I had come here to lose some weight, not to be a slave.

What in hell was going on here? Why was I in a strait jacket? But be brief! This has nothing to do with my stories.

She was indeed angry. This is real! You signed the contract! You are an inmate here now! You are a male slave! You had better learn the rules here, and fast!

You must start to learn, or you must suffer the consequences! She took what looked like a miniature steel bracelet up from the tray.

I was naked below my waist except that the strait jacket had a strap passing under my crotch, and my ankles felt like they were strapped down.

I felt her pick up my limp penis, and close the steel bracelet around it. It closed with a metallic click. It was a snug fit on my penis.

It felt cold. I felt a slight pricking feeling as it snapped shut. The feeling quickly faded. She dropped my penis, with the bracelet device locked on it.

All initial slaves have to wear these. It prevents masturbation. It has many small spikes on the interior surface, so that you will experience increasing pain if you begin to get an erection.

You will find that this will immediately stop any erection. It will be unlocked for cleaning once each week. You will only be allowed to masturbate once each week, under close supervision.

I stood up. I followed her out of the office. She led me to a small room. She left the room. I undressed, and put on the gown. I sat on the bench, and waited.

I was embarrassed by this, but did as she asked. You may put your gown back on. She gave me a short medical examination. She prepared a hypodermic needle.

She looked at me, as if she was trying to say something. No texts. He wasn't allowed to service me. He hated this type of punishment because it left him without order, without purpose.

Despite all of this, I still felt like I had no idea what I was doing — but I was learning. I watched more videos online, joined FetLife an online community dedicated to sexual fetishes , found a mentor through Twitter, and asked questions.

Through FetLife, I learned that the local men who were masters or dominants were almost all white and the language in their profiles frequently set off my internal racist alarms.

I saw one man with a picture of a Confederate flag belt buckle he used for flogging. The most popular local club, or "professional dungeon," lists in its code of conduct that "respect should always be accorded to every individual…" but when I'd see the expected attendees for gatherings, I'd cringe at how few people of color seemed to be present.

There were some black men who were doms, but based on their profiles, they were masters of primarily white women.

If I'd reached out to them, I think I would've been ignored or rejected. I didn't feel like I'd be safe or respected if I tried to attend one of the gatherings — not as someone new to the life and definitely not as a black woman.

I tried to find local black women dommes, but the majority of the black women I found were subs and slaves, who subjected themselves to race play — being called nigger, or acting as maids or breeders.

The few dommes I did see were fairly hardcore, their profiles filled with images of them in latex and stacked heels, whips gleaming in their hands.

I was too intimidated to approach them for mentorship. And I knew that wasn't the kind of domme I wanted to be. So I lived online, researching how to handle male subs.

I asked my male friends to tell me ways they'd like to be punished, if they would allow themselves the freedom of being submissive.

Because that's one of the many things I'd discovered as my relationship with Baby Sub continued: All he had to do was wait for me to give him instructions, wait to serve.

There's something very freeing about that. Meanwhile I had to put him on a schedule — when to wake up, when to contact me, when to go to bed.

I had to tell him what to wear, distribute punishments and rewards, figure out ways he could be of service.

Imagine being a teacher and creating lesson plans then grading all day, every day, without break.

It was slightly exhausting; his need to be controlled was controlling me. Being someone's mistress was more work than I'd anticipated, and I was no longer sure how sustainable it was for me.

Soon our schedules were in conflict, and it became a chore to see each other. I also began to resent how it felt like his need for a domme was taking over my life.

He began to throw more tantrums, upset at the lack of time we were spending together. My knee-jerk reaction, habit from my more traditional relationships, was to try to give him what he wanted.

Then I'd remember, I'm the domme here; not this pouty brat who needed more attention than I could give.

And I decided that I didn't have to put up with his attempts to manipulate me into giving him what he wanted. So I told him to move on and find someone more willing to devote the time he clearly needed.

Since then, I've started a new relationship that follows more traditional roles, but there are parts of myself that playing a domme unleashed that can't be bottled up again.

I'm much more confident voicing displeasure, as well as satisfaction. Being with Baby Sub gave me permission to explore parts of myself I'd previously denied and now I feel comfortable revisiting those areas in subsequent relationships.

I've also learned that when people call it a lifestyle, they really mean it. Taking on dominant and submissive roles is so much more than tying someone up or wanting to be spanked.

It can consume you, and you must be ready to handle the responsibilities that come with your positions. I still lurk at FetLife. I have a few favorite boards and found a few kinks I didn't know had names.

But unless I can find a local black woman domme to mentor me in person, I definitely won't attend any clubs here in town. And I can't see myself pursuing becoming a domme more seriously.

My Twitter mentor told me I'm horrible at establishing boundaries, and she was right.